A cure for hypocrisy?

There is no way to know completely just how sick any other person may be. We can only know how sick we are ourselves, but only if we are willing to take a serious look at ourselves. If we think we aren't hypocritical at all, then I would suggest that that is the very first indication of a very deep-seated hypocrisy. You need help. I did say that others cannot cure you, but I didn't say that they couldn't help you cure yourself. Of course, if you don't want help, you won't get any. Some things in life are actually very simple.

By the same token, I think it is useful and helpful for all of us to know to recognize a hypocrite when we see one. It is apparently very easy to become infected, and we may want to regulate our behavior if and when we may be dealing with them. How do we do this? Very simply: take others seriously; that's the first step, and then, all you need to do is assess whether what they think and say and say and do are in harmony with each other. The closer the match, the less infected they are. We actually do it every single day, but most of us only do in with others. We also have to do it with ourselves. Do we say what we mean and mean what we say? Do we behave according to what we say we mean? Any mismatch along the way should start raising flags.

The real key, however, is to pay attention to what people do. The old saying that actions speak louder than words is not just a saying. It's a little bit of wisdom that is very easy to put into practice. Of course there are some areas of life in which it is easier to practice than in others. The family, if you have one around, is good place to start, provided you enjoy a modicum of familiarity, familyness and openness. If you're always at each other's throats about whose turn it is to host Thanksgiving dinner or who gets what from Uncle Al's estate, well, you may have tougher time there than you thought. Another possibility is to work together with friends. This presupposes that they are actually friends, and not those of the fair-weather variety or really just acquaintances. In our modern world that works overtime to keep us all separated and thinking only as isolated individuals, there may be some preparatory work that you have to do before you can really get down to business.

You see, when we say one thing and do another, we really need someone to tell us that we did. We may know it in our hearts or conscience, but having someone tell you reminds you that it is apparent to others how you are behaving. By the same token, when someone we know says one things and does something else, we need to bring it to their attention, not to let them know what jerks they are, but so they become aware of the discrepancy and can start working to change that.

Yes, yes, I hear some of you now: but what if they don't want to hear about it? We all know people who don't. For one, we need to rethink our own relationship to these people if that is the case. You really have to ask yourself just who it is you want to chill with, just who or what you wish to be associated with. No one said it would be easy, and it won't be, that's for sure, but if you don't want to continue living in such an unjust world, well, you have to start somewhere, don't you?